Buying a used car is extremely complicated. You should do your research well and find most suitable car that satisfy your needs.
We share the six critical steps in choosing and buying an used car that will help you.
1- Do Your Research
Never, ever walk into a dealership "just to see what they've got."
Salesmen see that aimless stare on your face and they're like starving
cartoon wolves -- they don't even see a person; all they see is a giant
walking turkey leg. Most small and midsize dealerships will have online
inventories. Check those out in advance and start looking up the models
you're interested in, then read up on each one: Comb through car sites
like Edmunds, click on forum posts by owners, get the specs and find out
about users' experience with reliability -- hell, go to Wikipedia and
bone up on the entire history of the model and the powertrain you're
considering. Back in school, you'd do the same amount of research for a
book report on Huck Finn just because an older lady in a paneled skirt
threatened you with the alphabet -- you can do the same legwork for a
multi-thousand-dollar purchase you're going to entrust your life to
every time you leave the house to get a burrito. Whatever you do, the
point is to come in with a mental list: Do not let them steer you
outside of that list to a car that you're not familiar with. Adventure
is wondrous and grand, but the used car lot is not the place to listen
to strange old men in tattered clothes whisper of magical chariots.
Now this is the important part, so pay attention: No matter what anybody
tells you -- no matter how respectable the source -- never, ever, ever
buy the Kia. Regardless of dealership affiliation, every used car lot on
the planet has a dull red Kia out back that they want to show you. It's
going to feel wrong, somehow, like the air around it has gone stale.
That's the universe trying to warn you. There will be rational
arguments, and your brain is gonna be all like, "Hey, it sounds like
they've gotten a lot better lately," and, "Look, even the car magazines
think they've got some decent models." But there's a very simple
explanation for this illusion: It's a vast government conspiracy and
everybody is in on it but me. They are terrible cars that will explode
and betray you, no matter how meticulously you care for them. Isn't that
right, Optima, you fickle bitch?! You broke my heart! And for what? A measly 15,000 miles? I thought we had something! I spent two years inside of you. Does that mean nothing?!
2- Dealing with the Dealer
You need to treat the first few moments at a dealership like an
old-timey mobster being interrogated by the coppers: You don't say
nothin' about nothin'. Financing? What's that? Trade-ins? Ha, what a
hilarious portmanteau of gibberish! Price range? I don't even speak English.
The first step is just and only to find the car you want, go over it
carefully, take stock of any work that needs doing, and barter out the
final price. Only when that's all settled do you talk about trading in
something. Why would you discuss trade-ins right up front if you haven't
even found a car you like? You're not even sure you're shopping there
yet. The grocery store doesn't pull you aside when you walk in the doors
and ask how much you're planning to spend today. So why do dealerships
always want to know your price, payment and trades first? Because it
gives them leverage against you: "Oh, well, if we're going to do you a
favor and take this trade-in off your hands, you have to buy one of
these pre-selected vehicles." Or, "Oh, you're financing? Those aren't
our finance cars. Our finance cars are all dull red Kias; let's go out
back and take a look."
That's bullshit. Everything is a finance car. Just like everything is a
cash car. The car does not care how you pay for it. It is a car. Even if
it becomes sentient, it's mostly only going to care about fighting
crime and ramping shit, like K.I.T.T. from Knight Rider. And
brother, if that happens: You let it. You buy yourself a leather jacket
and a perm and get the fuck out of there; your car search is over.
3- Vechile Inspection
There are a few basic things you can check, even if you know nothing
about cars. First thing you want to do is get right up close against the
side of the front fender. (This should also serve to draw out any
potential sentient-car crime-fighting partners, as they cannot resist
wisecracking and will likely say something cute like, "Geez, buy me
dinner first." If so, then you're done: It's all cowhide coverings and
curly hair for the rest of your days.) If there's little to no rapport
between you and the vehicle at this point, just sight down the trim
lines to make sure they're straight with no fluctuations -- offset
doors, fenders, and uneven lines could indicate frame damage. Look
around the engine bay at the spots where the metal struts come together
-- the joints should be straight, with no signs of recent welding. Take a
look underneath the car and watch for rust on the rails, in the wheel
wells, or basically anywhere else. Be afraid of rust. Rust is the
mind-killer. You'll think you can take rust -- it's just some pansy
little oxidation, right? But you can't. Rust is better than you. Rust
will laugh at your feeble angle grinders; it will spit at your steel
wool and mock your puny acids. Rust will shrug off all your mightiest
efforts and then, when you are broken, it will take your woman in a way
that you never could.
Also remember to check the fluids. Don't just stare at the
engine with your dick in your hand, wondering if you could stop the
flywheel with your cock (no matter how awesome it would be to seize a V8
with nothing but your willpower and steely erection, this is not the
time for it). Pull those dipsticks out and check the reservoirs. Brake
fluid is, in an ideal world, clear to slightly yellowish. But the world
we live in is broken and flawed, so it's usually tea-colored. If it
looks like strong coffee, you're going to need to bleed the brake
system, at the very least. That's a few hundred dollars right there. It
doesn't require a lot of know-how or expensive parts, so you're going to
want to do it yourself.
Do not.
Bleeding brakes is exactly as traumatic as bleeding your only child,
only it takes like, four times as long (depending on size and age of
child). Check the oil: If it looks like a Wendy's chocolate Frosty, just
turn around and run. Run as fast as you can. Hop into your car and tear
ass out of that dealership like The Dukes of Hazzard. That
means a blown head-gasket, and it is death. If somebody assures you,
"It'll still run," you can respond, "So will a man with no legs, if you
shoot at him enough; that doesn't mean he'll get far." (The casual
murder references let 'em know you mean business.)
Make sure the coolant is clear, the transmission fluid is red or
purplish (just not black or oily) and all the belts and hoses are free
of cracks. Finally, if it's a new car or a big expense, you buy yourself
a copy of a program like Torque, then go on eBay and get an ODBII scanner.
Plug that into the car (the ODB slot is usually beneath the dash on the
driver's side) and you can see literally everything about its engine in
real time, right there on your smartphone. Do me a favor and look at
the salesman's face when you do it: See that expression? That's what
hope looks like, as it leaves the world. He's just realized he's not
going to win this one, because you're from the future -- you've already done this deal.
4- Flip the Table on Them
Right in the middle of conversation. Mid-sentence. Just smile nice
and big, reach under the lip, and flip that table up in the air. Then
sit back down and coolly state, "I'm sorry -- you were saying
something?"
Works.
Every.
Time.
For everything.
5- The Test Drive
First of all: If in doubt, ramp it.
Ramping is the ultimate test of a vehicle, from its ability to
accelerate, to the integrity of its suspension, to its indefinable aura
of testicular fortitude. You don't want a vehicle that pusses out when
it really counts, like some prissy little Jetta, do you? If they won't
let you ramp anything, at least take it on the highway. And don't be
gentle: A used car isn't spouse material just yet. It's a hot piece of
ass at the bar; don't be afraid to give it to 'em rough and weird,
because you're probably never going to see each other again. Accelerate
hard, corner sharply and brake quickly. Make sure it's not shaking all
over the place at high speed -- that could signal a bad alignment,
control arms, bushings, tie rods -- or a bunch of other silly words that
can cost you hundreds of dollars. If the pedal feels spongy while
braking hard, that could mean bleeding again. If it's stiff and
unyielding, it might be a bad brake booster. If the pedal shudders
beneath your foot, it could need new rotors. It doesn't matter if you
know or understand those words right now -- just throw them at the
dealer like lawn darts at your little brother. If you still want the car
despite the issues, at least it gives you ammo to drop the price later.
If it's an automatic and it jolts into gear when you accelerate evenly,
the transmission is probably bad. You just hop on out of that car, spare
a couple of polite middle fingers for the nice salesman, and run to
Mexico and sweet freedom. That is not fixable. Nobody understands
transmissions -- not even a mechanic. All anybody can do about a
transmission is just try to keep it happy, and try to shield our loved
ones from its horrible wrath if we fail. Watch the oil pressure, battery
and temperature gauges -- you probably won't be out long enough to
trigger them, but they're your last resort. If something is so wrong
that the gauges start maxing out during a short test drive, that car is
about to transform into Shittimus Prime, the shit robot, who will shit
all over your life until you are dead.
6- Heading Home
After you've done your due diligence, cussed and punched your way
through a few dealerships, combed Craigslist and found it to be full of
potential rapists, and attempted to appraise the integrity of every
single system in a giant, complicated machine that you've probably never
seen before -- you're finally ready.
You're ready to go home.
Oh, not with a quality used vehicle -- nobody promised you that. If
you're smart, and you've followed this guide to the letter, you've just
realized that every single vehicle for sale is an utter piece of
garbage; overpriced and fundamentally broken, guarded by a zealous tribe
of conmen who would rather chop off their own junk than come within
spitting distance of a blue book. No, the only intelligent thing to do
now is to leave with your dignity intact. Don't forget to turn
dramatically at the exit and promise that they'll rue something --
almost anything will do: "The moment you met me," "the decision to cross
me," or even just the boilerplate "this day" are all fine, as long as
they know they'll be ruing something. Don't worry; it's all part of the
dance.
It just gives them something to remember you by, because you'll be
back here doing this again the next time somebody gropes you on the bus.
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